I live my days choosing to see magic in every little detail, gathering evidence that I can revisit on the days that feel harder than others. I always joke around that one day I’ll write a book in the magical realism style, so naturally, this blog about Egypt starts just like that: With a wish whispered in India.
My first time in India was far from easy.
My nervous system was about to collapse. I went to an ashram, got an Ayurveda treatment for my knees and stomach, completed a 300-hour yoga training focused on philosophy and Ashtanga Vinyasa, and meditated on life, death, and the subtle veil between them quite often.
By the time I was done, my hands were shaking. I was having vivid dreams of Sanskrit tattoos being absorbed into my skin, among other crazy stuff, so I decided to stop all spiritual practices and go ground myself with pottery in the Himalayas for a couple of weeks.
No yoga. Just clay.
This whole part of my process was scary and disorienting. It also coincided with the time I officially moved to Montreal, so add homesickness and not having a work permit into the equation. It was rough.
I decided to ask Life/God/Universe/Shiva for clear answers.
I remember stopping in the middle of a meditation and saying out loud:
“Ya me cansé. No entiendo. Ya leí libros, ya medité, ya canté mantras, ya hablé con maestros, ya busqué y no entiendo. No sé qué querés de mí, pero arreglá este desorden que armaste: mándame un maestro, mándame a India otra vez con un plan claro para arreglar estas dudas y enseñarme el camino.”
Which translates to English as:
“I’m done. I don’t get it. I’ve read books, I’ve meditated, I’ve chanted mantras, I’ve talked to teachers, I’ve done the research, and I don’t get it. I don’t know what you want from me, but fix this mess you’ve made: send me a teacher, send me to India again with a clear plan to fix these doubts, and show me the way forward.”
I stopped having weird dreams after that.
One month later, I met the teacher who would eventually lead me back to India for a second trip.
On that second journey, I had many of my questions answered, and by the end of it, I was guided toward the path that eventually led me to become a Birth Worker, a Doula.
The last thing I did before coming back home from that second trip was talk to Nandi.
If you are not familiar with Hinduism, here’s a little context:
Nandi is Shiva’s gatekeeper—a white bull who sits in front of him, fully present in eternal devotion. According to a popular tradition, if you whisper your wish into Nandi’s ear, he will carry it to Shiva.
Disclaimer: I haven’t found any text saying that Shiva WILL grant your wish if you do this, and I’m not saying this is the only reason I got what I asked for. But again, I choose to see magic everywhere, so you may draw your own conclusions.
So, what did I ask Nandi?
“Take me to a place where I will learn the next thing I need to continue my spiritual growth. It doesn’t need to be India, but make it free. I don’t want to pay for anything. Nothing, nada. I want to fully enjoy and immerse myself in the place you’re sending me.
Oh, and make it happen before I become a mom.”
I know how much money it takes to make a trip to explore the spiritual aspect of the self, so I added the “make it free” line as a challenge.
Yes, I challenged the Universe there. And they delivered.
They also showed me something about money: that it is energy we can tap into, and that sometimes we need to trust that the right exchanges will happen for us to reach our goals.
But here is where the magical realism aspect of this story comes to life
Reality check #1:
I’m a self-employed doula in Montreal. I’m an immigrant. I do not come from money.
I work A LOT, I love what I do, and I’m good with my finances (blame it on my engineering background). I’m clear that I could NOT have done this without my partner and my amazing in-laws.
So this taught me a lesson: You can never accomplish something entirely just by yourself; there is always a person holding your hand, opening a door, encouraging you to keep going. We are never truly alone.
Reality check #2:
As a family, we’re not big spenders. We’re actually quite frugal.
So, to make a trip like this happen, we needed 1) a big motivation -my partner’s mom’s birthday- and 2) extra money to use without disturbing our monthly budget.
This is where fiction meets reality
We got a tax return that covered almost exactly what we needed to book the whole trip. And, well… we got the plane tickets with points and a couple extra bucks. Nothing is entirely free, but gurl… I’m taking a win with this one.
I think it’s important to believe that the Universe can have your back.
That sometimes, life conspires in unexpected ways to help us move toward what we’ve been asking for; especially when those wishes come from a genuine space of growth and expansion.
No, I don’t think we need to go to Mysore to talk to Nandi.
And hell no, I’m an independent woman, so I don’t expect my partner to gift me trips like this every other year, but I’d be lying if I said this didn’t feel nice (or that I’m not looking forward to the next tax return)
I know this was a special journey, fully guided and supported by love and light.
I have so much to process. So much to keep learning. And I know that nothing is entirely free. So I’m looking forward to all the people I’ll reach after this learning experience, and to becoming another tool through which life can offer what the Universe just gave me: Support, love, and the reminder that sometimes, the path reveals itself one wish at a time.
Thank you, India, for leading my way to Egypt
Thank you, 30-year-old Ale, for not giving up to solve your questions
